Flick

posted September 24th, 2015, 2:01 am


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October 4th, 2014, 2:46 am

GreenKrog

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Well.. THAT was interesting.

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September 24th, 2015, 12:03 pm

Erin (Guest)

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I mean, if that's weed, I would actually be less concerned than if it was a cigarette, but I assume that that's what it is. Reduced hunger and all that.

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September 24th, 2015, 12:20 pm

GreenKrog

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@Erin: It's a tobacco cigarette :( If it was weed, that would be a HUGE fatty. And it wouldn't have made it through airport security. It would make sense though to be weed, since weed tends to make people hungry, right? But no, this is just tobacco, which is for entirely different reasons that I get in to later. Mental patients and needing control.. what can I say.

Being a mental patient sucks.

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September 24th, 2015, 10:33 pm

fjolnir

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Tobacco is a depressant and ironically helps a lot of people with ADHD self medicate in ways that traditional stimulant based treatments don't.

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September 24th, 2015, 10:55 pm

Nick (Guest)

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Why does she call Annie "A" now? And why does Annie carry matches?

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September 24th, 2015, 11:03 pm

GreenKrog

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@Nick: There is no good explanation as to why she calls Annie 'A'. Maybe some badass thing. Like calling people only by their last name. Or something. Iunno. You know as much as I do.

You don't carry matches? I carry matches. I like to be prepared. I carry duct tape in my backpack in case I ever have to set a broken leg. Is that not normal? Guys? Guys? Herro? Where going?
...but seriously, my regular purse (otherwise known as the spiderbag, because it is black with spiderweb patterns, gothy and cool), I carry matches and hair accessories for my friends who always forget and backup cash and a compact even though I don't wear makeup and a pen and a bunch of paper in a folder. I thought everyone carried matches!

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September 26th, 2015, 1:23 am

Jax Rhapsody (Guest)

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I didn't think she would come back sane.

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September 26th, 2015, 2:42 pm

GreenKrog

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@Jax Rhapsody: I can't speak on behalf of all mental patients, but I can say that when I have left the hospital in the past I have been better off than when I went in. I was sort of hoping Lexi would be better too, but it clearly just made her angry.
Still, I would rather her be angry but physically healthy than happier and literally dying from lack of food.

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September 29th, 2015, 3:58 am

Jax Rhapsody (Guest)

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@GreenKrog

Oh; I don't dissagree with you, her healthy return is splendid. I've never been...instituted, but I know people who were, and once visted my friend Holly. I personally don't think I could do it. Wether what they do is for the best, or not, I'd be feeling some way about it, questioning their motives, and intenet.

I used ti worry about being put in a mental institution by accident, for some reason. My diplomacy has limits.

I digress; although healthy, the stint spent, seems to have reinforced, and exacerbated her attitude prior to the commitment. As if free, or confined makes no difference, yet some what pleased to be out, but not so pleased to what she returned to.

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September 29th, 2015, 10:53 am

GreenKrog

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@Jax Rhapsody: Lexi was clearly never ready to accept treatment. In the 5 stages of denial, she never really left bargaining at most.

How a person feels in an institution is largely dependent on why they are there and what doctors they get. The most recent time I was in was due to mania (a lot of cutting, speeding, and generally self-destroying) and it was fairly clear they didn't want me there or think I was real threat. I was so high at that point that I didn't care about anything (my boss had committed me). So I just told them everything, the full truth. I went through about 6 doctors in 5 days, because nobody could figure me out, which made them even angrier. I wasn't being diplomatic, I was actually asking for real help because I knew I would really hurt myself if I didn't get help. But they were not particularly useful. And yet, it was at worst a bit of a vacation from being able to hurt myself.

The first time I went in though, I was ready to get help, and they weren't able to do much. The doctors didn't even read my file, so they didn't see my cuts or that I was trans. They didn't put in a pretty basic effort to try to get through to me, when I was feeling the most worthless. Lucky for me there was a single nurse who really wanted to help and she talked to me a bunch when everyone else was asleep (and I wasn't overly drugged). After a few weeks they let me go home for a day trip to see how I would handle it. That's when I totally freaked out. I went to the bathroom where I nearly died and I totally broke down. I knew I could never be ok, and that the time in the hospital wasn't doing anything to fix that. They kept me for a few more weeks due to the state I returned to the hospital in.
Unlike your friend though, I am sure I feel safer in hospital psyche wards than I do around myself. I know I can't be trusted (my boss has a rule where I'm not allowed to live on my own any more) and in the hospital I can't hurt myself. Much.

I would go into the aspects of control and intent, but I think I begin to cover that in the following pages. Likewise, I think I talked about it before when I said that I didn't eat during my first stint in the hospital until they threatened to force feed me. Control is a very complicated subject.

Sorry, this has been a bit rambly, and I don't know the point I was trying to make exactly. Just sharing that I absolutely get why being institutionalized is good for some and much more damaging for others?

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October 4th, 2015, 4:04 am

Jax Rhapsody (Guest)

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Greenkrog, it's okay, I ramble too. I get sometimes they do what they need to, it's just sometimes I don't think a facility is going for the right reasons, and the way a patient is, is also a variable in that. It seems to still be either commonplace, or stereotype that places such as that have rarelly changed, kinda like the stigmata of nursing homes.

My fiance had to go to one a few years ago before she came to Kentucky, long story short; her parents are shady, and it wasn't a pleasant stay. They pretty much made her "volunteer" to go, and basically the world was against her, her aunt was the DA, and basically 98% of her problems was her abusive parents, who played it off and made her come off as much worse than she actually is. She had to follow this strict regiment that her therapist(under infuence of her parents) helped with, even when she got out(court ordered), if not she could've been there for a year. Places like that put a bad taste in my mouth.
I don't want to go off on a tangent, but I do see what you mean, and it's sad when it's like people are just there for a paycheck, just like when patients don't seem willing.

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